A Bunny of a Different Sort

I don't know about you, but I find the whole playboy enterprise super creepy. I am obviously not against softcore porn or masturbatory aides of any sort, but, as much as I love "The Girls Next Door," I am continually reminded of how creepy this crap is.

The first two seasons were very heavy on the three girls being blonde and having large amounts of small dogs with the occasional bewildered old Hef bumbling through the background like a more grey Ozzy. Even though they were usually dressed skimpily, the show was totally PG (if not G) and very family friendly. This season has just been awkward.

While there was an excellent episode in which Holly decorated her kentucky derby hat with My Little Ponies which was adorable on many levels, the past three episodes have focused on the "Search for the Anniversary Playmate," which consists of two things: one was showing interviews basically mocking women who come to the auditions and aren't playboy's definition of beauty.

Seriously, I just found some of it rude. Yeah, we get it, playboy only uses a certain sort of body and that girl is heavier than your point of view of beauty, but if she doesn't fit in so well maybe you shouldn't have shown her on your TV show anyway.

The second was showing multiple instances of girls who wanted to be in playboy because their moms had been in playboy. Hold the mother fucking phone! Your mom posed nude and you're into that? Not to get all Tyra on you guys, but I would so not look at my mom's old new naked photos if she had any.

If my mom had a porny past (which she doesn't) I would obviously support her and the choices she made and still love her, but my support would consist of NOT looking at her old porn. I just think thats creepy. Yes, I said creepy. Ogling your mom is creepy, srlsy, that is some freudian baffling shit.

I get that being in playboy is relatively fame inducing and having famous parents would be kinda cool. I get that these girls are fame hungry and their mothers being involved in playboy might help them in that weird, incestous company, but still. In our society this doesn't fly.

You know what else, in my humble opinion, shouldn't fly in our society? An 86 year old man dating 19 year old twins. He is clearly exploiting some daddy issues and some youthful ignorance there. Yeah there's the fame thing, and the money thing, but with an age difference of almost 70 years (an age 75% of my grandparents didn't live to) the age alone is creepy.

And the twins part is super creepy. I am watching the show RIGHT NOW and they have these twins, right (the ones I'm assuming he is dating right now) and they're doing their naked photo shoot and like pressing all up on each other naked. Gross. Thats your sister.

I don't know about your family, but my brother and I? We don't touch. Ever. No hugs, no arms on shoulders, no touching. And it isn't like a concious choice, but we're brother and sister. We are obviously very close, but our sibling relationship doesn't include touching.

Maybe with sisters it's different, but I don't think it necessarily should be. Yeah, so those girls shared a womb. They probably shared a bedroom since they were born and, in this episode of the show, were dressed the same. That was also creepy, in my opinion, my cousin had twins six years ago and they never dressed those girls the same. But of course, my cousin is normal and wanted to encourage individuality in her daughters...individuality and NOT posing naked in trash magazines.

These girls are obviously exploiting their sibling relationship to elevate the barely-legal, pseudo pedaphilic vibe oozing out of them. They're dressing (and acting) like little blonde twins and the creepy old playboy guys were falling all over themselves.

And now Hugh Hefners dating these twins. Yuck yuck yuck. Could you ever imagine dating the same person as your sibling at the same time?! So...do they have sex with him at the same time? They're clearly deluded enough to be cool with being all up on each other naked, but incest is a crime in this country. A super creepy crime, in my opinion.

Gross. This show has left me feeling dirty but I already showered tonight and I don't want to dry out my skin. Gross gross gross. I am 100% against this situation and, honestly, need to stop watching this show. I want my goofy blonde bimbos with their herds of toy dogs back. I don't want these naked, back water-moraled freaks anymore